Monday, January 29, 2007

Craving human interaction

I work from home two days a week typically. And it’s great to be able to just get up put the coffee on…get my kids off to school and work in my pajamas. Isn’t that the ultimate goal… to work in your pajamas?

And don’t get me wrong… I LIKE working from home. I get some stuff done quicker. And given the nature of my job, it doesn’t really matter in most cases where I am physically, since everything is done by phone and email.

Last week, however, I was home 3 days instead of my usual two. And my husband’s been busy… so by the end of the week I REALLY needed to get out of my house, have some time alone where I was not working and was sans children and talk to someone over the age of 5.

I never realized how much not having live humans to talk to would effect me. I mean especially because I spend all of my working hours creating and managing electronic communication. And much of my own free time is spent communicating with friends and strangers through emails and blogs.

I guess there’s no risk of me becoming a shut in, huh?

But of course that got me thinking… In an age where we are constantly connected, how can we still feel so isolated? I can’t believe that I’m alone in this. It’s so easy to just be connected through electronic means but takes time and effort and coordinating of schedules to actually be in the same room as people you care about.

I feel that there’s this dichotomy of a sense of community (blog or otherwise) compared to this feeling of disconnect because I don’t see and spend enough physical time with some people who are important to me.

I definitely need both. I need to see people, hug them, and laugh out loud with them not just LOL with them.

Friday, January 12, 2007

What is he thinking?

I just got back from a business trip last night so I watched the President's speech the other night from the comfort of my company paid hotel room. And my consideration for my fellow guests is probably the only thing that kept me from screaming at the TV.

I've long since stopped asking myself "what was he thinking" because it's painfully obvious that he just plain...isn't. But thankfully, in our 24 hour news cycle, there are others to remind him and us of what he's already told us.... so in case you had any doubts that King George would rather rewrite history than be hassled to remember what he's said before... take a look at Keith Olbermann's commentary from Wednesday night just before the speech.

And really, what is a surge but George's way of sticking out his tongue and saying "yup, I"m gonna send some more innocent lives in harms way. And you can't stop me." ?

Friday, January 05, 2007

A debate about older mothers

There's a great little debate going on over at Citizen of the Month about the woman in Barcelona who just gave birth to twins at 67. (by IVF obviously).

I, as well as others, fell pretty strongly that this was selfish on so many levels on the part of the mother. But Neil at Citizen of the Month wants to know why it is selfish when no one says anything if a 70 year old man fathers a child.

Double Standard? Yes.

But there are so many realities in place here:
  • women are often the primary caregivers for young children (except in my house and a rare few others)
  • At 67 it is unrealistic to think that this woman will be a part of her children's lives as long as say, if she were 37.

And having been through the whole IVF thing personally, I want to know what doctor in their right mind agreed to this? Apparently she had it done somewhere in Latin America but REALLY... this doctor needs to have his or her license revoked.

Is there no code of ethics? Did no one think this might not be such a good idea?

But was it her right to do.... grudgingly, I have to say yes.

Others are commenting that she had the right to do whatever she wants with her body and while there are few people who are more Pro-Choice than me... I have to disagree here. She did not do this on her own. They were someone else's eggs (because, let's be realistic here...she is 67!!) And there was a fairly large team of experts making it all happen.

Being pregant with and caring for newborn twins zaps the stuffing out of even the most motivated of mothers...and no one is more motivated that someone who's been through many years of infertility (like me) AND YET... I still can't wrap my brain around setting out on that journey at 67.

What was she thinking??

There are no good answers.

My final word on Resolutions

What is it about turning the calendar to January that inspires us all to want to be better people?

Doesn’t everyone want to lose weight, stop smoking, be more organized, (insert resolution here) all the time?

We could certainly resolve to be a better person when turning the calendar page to…say… Thursday.

And Janaury does always represent that feeling of a fresh start. I get it. But after hemming and hawing about what I’m going to do better this year… I’m finally just resolving to:

Do better

And if I don’t… then tomorrow is another day to:

Do better, now.

And so on.

And in that category of Doing Better… here the things I’d like to be better at:

  • Better at eating (actually, I’m kinda great at that now which is part of my problem)
  • Better at taking care of myself and those I love
  • Better at parenting
  • Better at staying on top of things before they become crises

And I want to be a better friend. Life gets in the way, and I’ve found myself losing touch with people that I didn’t’ mean to lose touch with. And I’m not as close as I want to be with some others that I see all the time. I want my children to understand how valuable and precious good friends are.

So today,
And tomorrow
And the day after that

I’m going to do better.